Negative self talk is a nasty fucking sneaky habit.
After a good batch of therapy (strongly recommend) I was able to start recognising the cruel messages I told myself daily.
I was SO cruel.
Rebekah you're useless. Why do you even try?
Just give up.
Stop wasting space.
Rebekah you're ugly.
people can't stand to be around you
because you're annoying and stupid
and no one will ever love you,
because as I said, you're ugly.
Rebekah you're a failure.
Stupid, Ugly, Useless, Failure.
Once my mum said to me:
"Would you ever say these things to your best friend?"
No! Never! Of course not! That's horrible! I would never say those things to anyone!
"So why do you say them to yourself?"